2008 Woodie Awards
Through the looking glass
A collection of weird and off-beat news from around the world.
Mike Pingree (MCT)
Issue date: 12/6/06 Section: Opinion
- Page 1 of 1
I'M OFF MONDAYS, WHY DO YOU ASK?
A teenager robbed the bank in Spencer, Mass., where his grandmother works, but waited until her day off before he pulled the heist. Granny saw videotape of the robbery and noticed physical similarities between the robber and her grandson. Further adding to her suspicions was the fact that the lad had been asking her about her work schedule.
YOU SEE THE BEAUTY OF NATURE, I SEE LUNCH
Birdwatchers in the United Kingdom were excited to find that a red-rumped swallow, normally seen only around the Mediterranean Sea, had taken up residence on the east coast of Scotland. Word spread fast and dozens of birders gathered to see the swallow flying over the beach, when a sparrowhawk swooped down on it and killed it instantly.
NOW THAT YOU MENTION IT, I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM IN A WHILE
Police responding to a report of water coming through the ceiling at an
apartment building in Framingham, Ma., went to the unit upstairs where they found a heavily intoxicated young man who claimed to be the nephew of Supreme
Court Chief Justice William Rehnquist. He told the cops that his uncle would be upset with them, saying, "Officer, you are all done."
The policemen do not believe that the man is related to Rehnquist as he was apparently unaware that he has been dead for more than a year.
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT, THE COPS ARE RIGHT BEHIND US!
Four teenagers robbed a Pizza Hut in Richmond, Va., and fled in a car they had rented for their getaway. The car was equipped with a Global Positioning System tracking device, so when witnesses wrote down the license plate number, the cops had no trouble finding them.
UH, GOD, PERHAPS WE DIDN'T MAKE OURSELVES CLEAR
After church leaders in Australia launched a national day of prayer for rain, the nation was hit with hailstones the size of baseballs, an icy blast of air that sent temperatures plummeting, and bolts of lightning that set off a wave of wildfires.
PARDONNEZ MOI, I JUST NEED
ONE MORE THEENG
A man broke into a house in Mussidan, France, and stole a television set. While the owner was reporting it to police, the burglar came back for the remote control.
OH! I PUT IT ON VIBRATE ... OH YESSSSSS!
Because cell phones have been banned in New York public schools, teenage girls have been sneaking them into the buildings in their panties.
A teenager robbed the bank in Spencer, Mass., where his grandmother works, but waited until her day off before he pulled the heist. Granny saw videotape of the robbery and noticed physical similarities between the robber and her grandson. Further adding to her suspicions was the fact that the lad had been asking her about her work schedule.
YOU SEE THE BEAUTY OF NATURE, I SEE LUNCH
Birdwatchers in the United Kingdom were excited to find that a red-rumped swallow, normally seen only around the Mediterranean Sea, had taken up residence on the east coast of Scotland. Word spread fast and dozens of birders gathered to see the swallow flying over the beach, when a sparrowhawk swooped down on it and killed it instantly.
NOW THAT YOU MENTION IT, I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM IN A WHILE
Police responding to a report of water coming through the ceiling at an
apartment building in Framingham, Ma., went to the unit upstairs where they found a heavily intoxicated young man who claimed to be the nephew of Supreme
Court Chief Justice William Rehnquist. He told the cops that his uncle would be upset with them, saying, "Officer, you are all done."
The policemen do not believe that the man is related to Rehnquist as he was apparently unaware that he has been dead for more than a year.
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT, THE COPS ARE RIGHT BEHIND US!
Four teenagers robbed a Pizza Hut in Richmond, Va., and fled in a car they had rented for their getaway. The car was equipped with a Global Positioning System tracking device, so when witnesses wrote down the license plate number, the cops had no trouble finding them.
UH, GOD, PERHAPS WE DIDN'T MAKE OURSELVES CLEAR
After church leaders in Australia launched a national day of prayer for rain, the nation was hit with hailstones the size of baseballs, an icy blast of air that sent temperatures plummeting, and bolts of lightning that set off a wave of wildfires.
PARDONNEZ MOI, I JUST NEED
ONE MORE THEENG
A man broke into a house in Mussidan, France, and stole a television set. While the owner was reporting it to police, the burglar came back for the remote control.
OH! I PUT IT ON VIBRATE ... OH YESSSSSS!
Because cell phones have been banned in New York public schools, teenage girls have been sneaking them into the buildings in their panties.
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