2008 Woodie Awards
Through the looking glass
A collection of weird and off-beat news from around the world.
Mike Pingree (MCT)
Issue date: 2/21/07 Section: Opinion
- Page 1 of 1
AN ATTORNEY DROPS HER BRIEFS
A married female attorney had sexual relations with four married men, after which her husband, also a lawyer, threatened to sue each of his wife's lovers unless they paid him for his "emotional distress." The four, who had the encounters with the woman over a six-month period, paid him a total of $144,000. But a Texas grand jury says that the couple was engaged in a scam of coercion and deception and indicted them for theft.
FREEZE! THIS IS A STIC ... BLAM!
A man tried to rob a gun store in Penrose, New Zealand, with a machete. The proprietor shot him.
SHOW YOU MY WHAT?
A tenant in York, England, is facing eviction, because her parrot, which sits in her front room has been screaming, "Show us your knickers," at the neighbors as they pass by the house.
WE FEEL WE'VE GIVEN YOU AMPLE
WARNING, OLD MAN
A man provoked the ire of his fellow bar patrons at the Gordon Arms pub in Southampton, England, for playing Mariah Carey songs on the jukebox 20 times a day for six years. They were particularly irritated because he played "All I Want for Christmas" all year round. He has been banned from the Gordon Arms for life.
ON SECOND THOUGHT ...
A man, serving a sentence for theft, escaped from the Frontenac prison in Kingston, Ontario, during the height of a blinding snowstorm, but the weather was so bad that he returned to the jail early the next morning and asked to be let back in.
THIS BEHAVIOR ISN'T UP TO OUR SALOON'S
STANDARDS, LADIES
Two young ladies were thrown out of the Grumpy Mole Saloon in Christchurch, New Zealand, for kissing passionately on the dance floor. It was distracting the other patrons.
GOOD GRIEF! WHERE'D ALL THESE
COPS COME FROM?
After burglarizing a home on Belle, S.C., and driving off, a couple had a flat tire, so they pulled into a tire center for help. While there, they stole some tools, but the proprietor saw them and they fled _ unfortunately for them _ right into an area where a SWAT team and a K9 unit had assembled to deal with an unrelated emergency. They were arrested.
HONEY, I THINK WE SHOULD
HAVE A LITTLE TALK
After examining the call history on his girlfriend's cell phone and discovering she had been talking to other guys, an Independence, Mo., man tried to shove the phone down her throat. The phone was removed via emergency surgery, and the man was convicted of second-degree domestic assault.
OH SURE, WHERE CAN WE MEET?
A drug dealer in Bladen, N.C., calling one of his regular customers, inadvertently dialed the cell phone of a local police officer, and made arrangements to sell him some illegal substances.
A married female attorney had sexual relations with four married men, after which her husband, also a lawyer, threatened to sue each of his wife's lovers unless they paid him for his "emotional distress." The four, who had the encounters with the woman over a six-month period, paid him a total of $144,000. But a Texas grand jury says that the couple was engaged in a scam of coercion and deception and indicted them for theft.
FREEZE! THIS IS A STIC ... BLAM!
A man tried to rob a gun store in Penrose, New Zealand, with a machete. The proprietor shot him.
SHOW YOU MY WHAT?
A tenant in York, England, is facing eviction, because her parrot, which sits in her front room has been screaming, "Show us your knickers," at the neighbors as they pass by the house.
WE FEEL WE'VE GIVEN YOU AMPLE
WARNING, OLD MAN
A man provoked the ire of his fellow bar patrons at the Gordon Arms pub in Southampton, England, for playing Mariah Carey songs on the jukebox 20 times a day for six years. They were particularly irritated because he played "All I Want for Christmas" all year round. He has been banned from the Gordon Arms for life.
ON SECOND THOUGHT ...
A man, serving a sentence for theft, escaped from the Frontenac prison in Kingston, Ontario, during the height of a blinding snowstorm, but the weather was so bad that he returned to the jail early the next morning and asked to be let back in.
THIS BEHAVIOR ISN'T UP TO OUR SALOON'S
STANDARDS, LADIES
Two young ladies were thrown out of the Grumpy Mole Saloon in Christchurch, New Zealand, for kissing passionately on the dance floor. It was distracting the other patrons.
GOOD GRIEF! WHERE'D ALL THESE
COPS COME FROM?
After burglarizing a home on Belle, S.C., and driving off, a couple had a flat tire, so they pulled into a tire center for help. While there, they stole some tools, but the proprietor saw them and they fled _ unfortunately for them _ right into an area where a SWAT team and a K9 unit had assembled to deal with an unrelated emergency. They were arrested.
HONEY, I THINK WE SHOULD
HAVE A LITTLE TALK
After examining the call history on his girlfriend's cell phone and discovering she had been talking to other guys, an Independence, Mo., man tried to shove the phone down her throat. The phone was removed via emergency surgery, and the man was convicted of second-degree domestic assault.
OH SURE, WHERE CAN WE MEET?
A drug dealer in Bladen, N.C., calling one of his regular customers, inadvertently dialed the cell phone of a local police officer, and made arrangements to sell him some illegal substances.
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